Jim Cramer: foot in mouth disease more deadly than Ebola to your retirement!

Financial con man and laughingstock of successful traders around the world, Jim Cramer is out today making sure that we will have plenty to mock him about with his statement that you can't retire without own stocks. 

His laughable, truly hilarious advice?  "Know what you own," he insists. "Describe it to me. Tell me what it does and why you bought it, and give me a three-sentence pitch about why it's good.... If you can make a clear case as to why your holdings are solid stocks, your portfolio should be a-ok".


HA HA HA!  This is bullshit on so many levels but I will just name a few:

• How can you know anything about a business?  Do you have lunch or play golf with the CEO?  If not then all you know is what you have been fed in order to get your money into their Ponzi.  You cannot know what is going on in a business but you can know that a rising tide floats all boats and a falling tide will run the mightiest aircraft carrier aground.  GE is going to go bankrupt this time around!   Yeah I know, I'm the only one who thinks so but soon enough people will be saying "we never saw it coming".  Why?  Because they have been following dumb ass Cramer's advice!  They have been thinking they know something about GE while ignoring the massive, festering, incomprehensible debt pile that they have taken on in their vendor finance scam.  Who besides me has EVER said this about GE?  Google it for yourself!
• All of these stocks that Cramer thinks are great for retirement were trading in the dirt in early 2009.   Many have tripled since then, others are up 8-10x (like banks).  What changed in their business models?? NADA.  The only difference was the Bernanke Put and all this did was cause bulls to leverage up in the thinking that the fed "can't let interest rates rise and can't let asset prices (including stocks) go down".  Never once do these bozos doubt the God-like power of the fed!  They are completely blinded by their lack of real understanding of what drives share prices and right now the main driver is MARGIN DEBT.
• Cramer is adding his voice to a growing cacophony of scared leaders.  Ichan trying to pump apple, Buffett telling everyone he bought the dip, blah blah blah.  The mood of the herd has changed and these guys subconsciously know it which is why they feel compelled to scream their love for the Ponzi.  But each time another one of them adds their voice to the persuasion, the more fearful the herd becomes.  When stocks are a real value, it only takes a whisper to get the herd moving into them but at tops like we have right now, even the loudest Cramer pump comes off as nothing more than desperation.

Prechter told us it would be like this.  If you have not read his 2002 book, "Conquer the Crash", I suggest that it is now a very timely read and it will contain many insights that we will see playing out in real life "real soon now".

If you see Cramer on TV, either treat his words as financial comedy or as a contrarian indicator because his show will be CANCELLED before this crash is over.  Again, this is the ultimate contrarian position but I am convinced it will occur.  Many things will occur in the next two years that nobody saw coming, nobody thought was possible.  Except of course, true economists (libertarians of the Austrian school) who understand that debt based economics is Ponzinomics which always leads to booms and busts.